December 25, 2018
I woke up today. Looking outside its cloudy but a pretty day. I am on the computer like any other day. The house is quiet. The day is like any other day. Later this afternoon I will be with friends and the day will be festive. Tonight I will bring leftovers to my adult son who is staying home alone. The evening will be a day for connecting. In the middle of the night, when it is quiet again, I will be up reading and reflecting as the day comes to an end.
This is Christmas. It is a special holiday for those of us who are Christians. It is especially nice if friends and family gather together…but that is not always possible. I went 8 years without anyone else involved in my day. What I can tell you is this– the day is what you choose to make it and see it as: a beautiful day / a routine day / a festive day / a connection day / a day of reading and reflection.
We choose our perspective. We choose to remember good memories. We choose to feel sorry for ourselves.
If this day is not what you hope it will be you have choices: change the situation or change your perspective. Will it be easy– no. But how many holidays do you wish to come and go that are other than pleasant?
If you have to go to family that is unpleasant- take a friend with you. Or make a get away plan and announce when you arrive you can only stay this long (whatever time length you choose). Then you control how long you will expose yourself to others. Get in, catch up, be nice and loving, eat, then leave while its all still cordial.
If you are alone– plan a day you will enjoy. What is your favorite hobby? What have you yet to watch on Netflix? Is there a soup kitchen you can serve food at to those on the street today? Spend some time journaling about your FAVORITE (positive only) memories of Christmas past. Write, and allow yourself to feel, gratitude lists. Be good to you!
And if this doesn’t work– see what you can do in 2019 to develop some friendships so you will not be alone next Christmas. Join a church and get involved. Join a club, start a club. Attend meet ups– if people still do that. Volunteer and meet others. Join an online community that you could at least engage with online next Christmas and check in with your friends so you do not seem alone.
We do not have extended family over because my brother lives in a different state and my uncle lives in a different country. We will not be opening presents today but we are grateful for the things we have had all year and the treats package that came from an online “big sister” to me. There will be no table spread from here to there. But we are TRULY blessed. I have my son here. It wasn’t like that for several years. We had all our NEEDS provided for this year and several wants. Are there changes that we would make with a magic wand? Sure–that is true for everybody even the rich and famous. But today is a day for peace, for joy, for relaxing and reflecting. And we have that because we choose to do that with our day.
What I am saying is this… if you are worn and weary there is hope today. God provided a way to reunite with him. We are claimed and loved. That is the point of Christmas. All the other stuff and situations is what we choose to do with our day. Make it what you want. Make it a brilliant day. Just remember, millions of us believe the reason we celebrate in joy and wonder is because Jesus came to show us another way and to give us a chance to reunite with God. And everyone has that to celebrate regardless of the circumstances of this one day.
Until next time~